Tough Decisions, or, I'm Not a Quitter--Honest!

Being a writer means making lots of choices. Why did Uncle Melvin kill off Cousin Carl? How will Detective Haskins discover the killer? Why did Sarah run off with Luigi? And on and on...

One of the toughest things about being a writer is knowing when to quit. Not necessarily for the day, but when is the story done. Or when it's not done, and there's nothing you can do at this point in your life to make it done.

by Astroboy_71

I'm facing one of those times right now.

For the last 6 1/2 years, I've been working on a novel project. It's had a lot of names, but right now, it's "Homebody". This novel predates my children being born, and the two main characters actually predate my marriage.

Over the last year or so, I've struggled with the book. I'm on like the 7th draft or some crazy thing, and I keep feeling like I'm circling around when it could be considered done, but just not quite there. Those who have read it say the same thing. But I can't figure out what's wrong with it, not now at least. For a while, I thought it was done: I submitted it to agents, and have received a few nice, even encouraging replies, but nothing that would have me thinking I'm almost there.

In a last-ditch effort, I asked Texas Momma (aka Linda Yezak) to take a look at it this spring. Between all her battles, she read a few chapters, but life happened and she had to return it, mostly unread, but with a few very helpful suggestions.

Then, last week, I got that niggling feeling again, like it was time to let it go.

I've had that feeling off and on for a while. I'm not sure why, but after it came back stronger than ever, I decided I'd e-mail Texas Momma about it. Even though I asked, I wasn't quite prepared for the blunt reply:

"Give up on Homebody. Save the personalities for another book, if you'd like, but I'd quit on it."

My stomach clenched reading those words. This book has become so much a part of my identity the last several years. How can I just give it up? It's almost like abandoning one of my children at the grocery store.

One thing you should learn early on as a writer is to kill your darlings. In other words, that turn of phrase you think is so clever, or that scene that you love but doesn't necessarily fit with the rest of the book. Perhaps it's the same way with this book--it's become my darling in many ways.

When I first started it, I was a completely different person than I am today. I had different goals, different aspirations, different worries. And, writing... and rewriting Homebody was cathartic in many ways. In the past six years, I've started work on several other projects, most of which I've finished, one or two I haven't for whatever reason--my creative juices ran out, I lost interest, etc.

Homebody wasn't the first novel I wrote. No, that disgraceful thing happened back in my teens. I pray it never again sees the light of day. A couple more came in between, both before and after a hiatus in my last semester of college into the first year of married life. Perhaps Homebody is that transition for me--the one I needed to get out, but isn't yet worthy of being published. Perhaps the next one or two books I've got on my plate will be it. I hope so.

For now, I must say goodbye to this story. Thank you for helping me grow as a writer. I'm sorry I had to use you to do it, that you never reached your full potential, that I wasn't the writer you needed me to be. Just know that even though you will remain on my flash drive, and I may never open you again, you've been valuable. I will always have fond memories of writing you.

As for my characters, Amanda O'Flannigan and Richard "Rick" Pierce, I think they'll be around again. Almost as soon as I made the decision that it was time to cut it loose, I got a new idea which would be perfectly suited (I think) for them. And, Homebody definitely allowed me to come up with a great deal of back-story for these two. I hope it comes to fruition, mostly because I love both of these characters dearly. I'm not quite ready to quit on them, even if I have to quit on one of their stories.

For the time being, I'm going to get back to work on "Reprisal". I'm mid-way through the 3rd draft, and it's lingered far too long as I've had two children, done NaNo, and tried to get that OTHER book done. I'll try to post monthly reports, even if they're brief, on how that's going. Once I've completed the 3rd draft, I'm going to go back to my 2009 NaNo project, "Beyond Dead". It's very short--just barely over the 50K minimum to win NaNo, and ideally I'd prefer it around 80K. That's a lot of words to add! But, one thing at a time.

If you're a writer, how do you gauge when it's time to cut a story loose permanently and stop working on it? Have you ever had to do it? Did you mourn for the story and/or characters as I feel I'm doing a bit of now?

Happy trails,

How to Devour Books Without Really Trying

Anyone who knows me knows I go through phases where I do things. I've been this way as long as I can remember.

By Bob AuBuchon

In the last 10 years or so, my activities usually have a revolution over the course of a year or so which include intensive times of writing/editing, reading, and some sort of craft (primarily crochet, but sewing and candle making have taken that spot as well.)

I'm in a weird spot right now where I'm actively pursuing all three activities with almost equal vigor.

And, I have my friend Juliet to thank for that.

A couple months ago, probably the last time I was physically at my local critique group, Juliet as well as one of the other ladies asked if I'd read a certain author. I'm like, "Who?" I'd never heard of Craig Johnson. They were going on and on about the books, then the fact the books were being made into a TV show on cable and how well it was done.

Well, Juliet insisted I read the first book, The Cold Dish. I'd hoped to have it from my library before going out of town a couple weeks later. (Didn't happen--apparently, they're very popular right now, probably because of the TV show!) It took me about 4 - 6 weeks to get it...

... and I couldn't put it, or its sequels down.

Really.

I've read the first 5 books of the series in the last 6 - 7 weeks, have yet to watch the TV show online (I don't have a working TV for broadcast or cable, so only catch stuff on Hulu when it's available). And, on top of that, I've started reading other books again. Like Robert B. Parker, Lisa Gardner, and I have a stack on my nightstand that includes Kathy Reichs and Diane Mott Davidson.

Going back to my opening statement, I get into grooves where I'm only pursuing one task. Writing and editing had really taken over my life for the first 5 - 6 months of the year. This usually means I won't read any books whatsoever--not even writing help books--except review books for CCBR. The longest non-children's item I may read is a news article or a lengthy blog.

But the last two months have been wonderful... I've been writing actively, and reading when I'm not writing, then about 2 weeks ago, added in a craft project--crocheting a cotton afghan for my son (it's going to be a belated birthday present.)

All because of Craig Johnson.

And Juliet of course.

If you write, do you find you can do all of your other interests in close proximity with each other? Or, do you usually divide up your time whether intentionally or inadvertently so you write during the course of a few days/weeks/months and do other things in a different time frame?


Until next time,


P.S., are you on GoodReads? If so, feel free to connect with me! LS

Two Years... and Counting...

Two years ago, my house was blessed to have the most precious (and I'm not biased in any way) little boy come into our home. His labor and delivery were brief (2 hours of labor, 3 minutes for delivery).

And when I saw him for the first time, I was stunned he was a boy (I'd really thought we were having a girl.) But, I thought he was perfect in every way.

I still cling to that thought every now and then. Now, I know he's not perfect (he's got the ornery streak to prove it!) And, I know he'll never be the same as other little boys--not just because God made him different, but because of what's different about him at a cellular level.

When I was growing up, I can't remember having birthday parties. Sure, I had a girlfriend over most every birthday, or went to spend the week of my birthday (which strangely almost always fell over spring break) at my grandparent's house in the Ozark's of Missouri. But, I never really had parties that I can remember.

Alexander

With Alexander, we don't know how many years we're going to get with him. He may grow up, have a family, and get to raise his own children, see his grandchildren.

I pray this is the case.

But, I also am all too aware that every birthday he has may be his last one. And, as a mother, this chokes me up. As I'm writing this, I'm crying, even though I can hear him and his sister in the next room, playing.

You see, his condition, Shwachman-Diamond Syndrome (SDS), puts him at a high risk of developing leukemia. I've talked about that before. Right now, until he has his next biopsy next month, we know he's at an even more elevated risk.

And, should it come to it, and he requires a bone marrow transplant, I know he's got but a 50/50 shot. We saw it with another SDS family just in the last few weeks. Their son had a transplant, and sadly passed away a few days later. He wasn't much older than our little guy.

It scares me, more than I thought anything ever could.

So, on Saturday over the weekend, Alexander turned two. And, we celebrated, as we expect we'll be doing not just with him next year, but with his older sister when she turns four in October.

While both of them can drive me nuts, and some days I wonder if it's really worth it, something in the back of my mind reminds me that all of our days are numbered. Only God knows how many days we get. And even though writing my stories are important to me, blogging and social networking are fun and even important tools as I try to get the engine going on my writing career, there's things more important.

Until next time,

Liberty

P.S. -- I should have mentioned this when it posted, but I guest blogged over on Linda Yezak's site about 10 days ago. Should you get a chance, go check it out.